jovial putatortle

The other day I was bumping Rogue Squadron's stellar -_- mixtape in my car while going home from work,and was listening to this particular track from Familyboy titled After World Funeral.Maybe it was a stressful and tiring day,or maybe it was bjork's haunting voice looming over the track,what happened was I kind of spaced out while I was driving and listening to the song.And I was crossing a roundabout.Luckily bjork ain't got shit on me and I managed to snap out of it and maneuver my way across said roundabout without having my head smashed into my car's windshield.Fuck a swan-suit,damnit.

Awkward pause.


I mean not that pain means shit to me,being somewhat unfuckably invincible and all(or so I believed),but I don't think I can afford to crash my car again.

Speaking of car crash,after three weeks my car is still at the mechanic.Since there were tales of repairshops that replace your car's genuine parts with Taiwan-made ciplak stuff,I decided to take it back to Eon to have it repaired and claim my car's insurance. One thing about crashing a car:the frustration and angst was not so much about getting a bigass dent on a side of the vehicle,its the sheer follow-up work that comes with that.And not having a car for the next 3 weeks.Just to have my car repaired using my insurance claims requires me to go to the bank to get the car's ownership cert,going to JPJ to get a verification on my driving licence to prove that I drove more than 2 years (since I lost my driving licence before,and without verification I need to pay RM400 to Eon),going to the insurance company to get a copy of the cover letter or preferably the policy,and of course making and getting the police report.Notice that I separated the making with the getting,since you have to wait a day to get it because apparently the police's mission is to fuck with you by not giving you a report on the spot.Then again I heard that you need to pay ten bucks to bribe them to speed up the process,which being the stingy bastard that I am do not really agree to.Come to think of it the mechanic at Eon is probably waiting for me to pass him a RM50 note to speed things up too.

So for the past couple of weeks,I need to wait at the bus stop near my house like an ass and hail a cab to work,which cost me six bucks a trip for a 7-minute drive.That I can live with,however the 7 minute spent in the taxi listening to an old fart talking non-stop about his extremely mundane life/extremely skewed views on politics is quite unbearable.Imagine a person talking to you about how his neighbour is 'stealing his water supply' (Which I highly doubt one can do) and how the friendly staff at the post office doesn't give a fat fuck about his plights (maybe because its highly improbable) while attempting to give you the rough estimated amount of water he actually uses per day and how it does not have a positive correlation with the water bill.RIIIIGHT.

There's this chinese saying: one eats rice, but do not know what it really costs.Or something like that.My parents used to throw this pseudo-proverb at me whenever I wanted to buy something,implying that I know squat about the high price of whatever I wanna get.Basically,it is usually used by person A who fork out the moolah to buy stuff,to person B,who requested for said stuff. This phrase hits hard when you are shelling out your hard-earn salary to pay for whatever that you previously took for granted.Now every month when I get paid I need to put aside money to pay for my car loan,my laptop,my insurance,my petrol,my food,my internet bills,phone bills,and whatever pirated DVDs that I buy.You could actually hear your wallet wailing in despair and agony as you take out that RM50 note to buy the WCP Booty Bus:Hardcore and Uncensored series.Now I know how my dad felt.To feed us and put us through school I mean,not buying the WCP Booty Bus thingy.

through the wire

'Hey..I think we are going the wrong way,' said Yuva,my colleague at work.She was sitting beside me in my car,and we were waiting at a traffic light on the left lane of two lanes.

"Really?" I frowned,looking around, trying to make sense of the roads,sign boards,and landmarks around me.We were in the Tasek Industrial Estate,where multinational companies and gargantuan factories nestled side by side. Huge lorries and trucks slowly lumbered along dusty roads while relatively smaller vehicles like ours weaved in and out.Most days of my work I would be going around places like these,making appointments with lab heads,purchasers,managers and the like in hope of making a deal,selling some laboratory instruments or analyzers.

"I hate to say this,but you are right,"I muttered.We had been trying to locate a certain company for more than 15 minutes,to no avail.The feeling of frustration prompted me to make a hasty decision.

"We need to make a U-turn,"I hissed at Yuva.

'But how?we are on the left side of the lane.'

On my right side was a car,and behind it a huge truck that I assumed was shipping compressed gas,with the tank and all. Suddenly,the car next to mine moved into another road,leaving a vacant space in front of the truck.

I grinned."That's our cue." Immediately I put the pedal to the floor and drove into the empty space,attempting to make a U- turn from there.I stopped my car in a 90 degree angle to the lane in the space,waiting for a clear traffic.

I heard a faint rumbling.And out of the corner of my eye,I sense movement.I turned my head towards my window.

And saw the front portion of the truck approaching the right side of my car.

It all happened so fast.My face was against the window,staring right up the truck's head,seeing it looming over my car.My jaw dropped in horror as reality dawned upon me.Yuva was screaming and trying to get out the door.And at that moment I heard the sickening crunch of metal compressing against metal.I felt my car trembled,shaken by the impact of the incoming truck.The truck was edging forward slowly.And taking my car with it.

Gripped with fear,I instinctively honked,pressing my hand on the horn as hard as I could.I could feel my car moving as the truck picks up momentum.After what feels like a lifetime,it stopped.I could hear a ringing sound in my ears.I realized that I had forgotten to breathe. Slowly,ever so painstakingly,the truck back up.It took awhile for the truth to sink in:I'm alive.muthafucking damnit I'm still alive. I slowly open the door,and I realized that my hands were shaking.When I step out of the car,my knees felt like it did not belong to me; they were wobbling ever so slightly.Weakly,I looked at my car to survey the damage.My first thought was wtf I just bought it for 3 months and now look at this.

Luckily was that me and my colleague came out unharmed, although visibly shaken.The truck driver told me that he did not notice my car.Heck,he did not even know that he rammed into my car,he only realized when I started honking.I was told that had he not stop,my car would be under the truck.And me in it.Crushed to death.The sheer possibility of this ending made me be thankful of how lucky I am to come out unhurt. Thank *Bleep* (Note:Any mention or reference to any sort of omnipotent higher being with power to create and destroy is automatically censored.But after this,I may need to rethink.)

Merdeka for me

First of all,happy belated merdeka day,even though there doesn't seems to be any much festive merdeka mood this year,probably due to our currently fucked up politics and lameduck leaders making asswiping decisions.Yes,Anwar may not be all he seems,bla bla bla,but I would rather see him take over and take this country in some direction,ANY direction,instead of fucktards bickering over trick shit which has nothing to do with our country's economy.Any worse than it is now and I may be out of a job and on a one way ticket to join the rest of the Cina Babis in China.Where it is even harder to find a job,but what the heck.

Anyway,I am currently working in Ipoh now,as a.... Sales And Service Engineer.Mind you,I got a degree in Biotechnology, and I'm an Engineer now?My homeboys who need to study for one more year for their engineering degrees are gonna bleed from their ears once I tell them.But then again don't let the name fool you,what I'm actually doing is in charge of the sales and troubleshooting of Lab equipments,ranging from Atomic Absorption Spectrophotometers to Centrifuges to Automated Analyzers to chemicals and labwares.Some of the more sophisticated machines can sell for more than half-a-million each,however I doubt that I could sell more than 1 in,I dunno,3 years?Means that I'll be deprived of my commission for possibly a long time damnit.And since my work requires me to travel extensively,I'll be in my car a lot,which means I need to get more songs to bump that boredom out of me while avoiding accidents due to distracting bass thumping gangsta rap music.

I just came back from a two-week trip back to Sabah for my convocation.Yup,after some near disasters i did manage to graduate,albeit not with too good grades,but then again graduate is graduate,lol.My parents and lil' brother came over too for a 5 day trip,and took them to Kudat,the Tip of Borneo,which is the highest point in the dog's ears.If you know what I mean.When my parents went home,I spent the remaining of my time hanging out with friends from my uni,catching up with them,asking bout their new jobs (or lack thereof),and basically getting wasted in pubs and hotel rooms.Gonna miss them much,those close friends that had been a part of my life for most of my past 3 years.All the best to them,and we will meet again.Soon.

During these two weeks,I managed to squeeze some time in between to finish some of my stuff at Decipher's lab.I finally finished recording my verse of an upcoming song,and gau dim the chorus too (yeah its a collaboration,btw).And talking bout Decipher,Da Man just released a song from his two-man-band with Jessel known as Digital Licks.The song,named Forget Not,is actually in conjunction with merdeka,and serve to remind the listeners of the unsung war heroes in Malaysia,especially Borneo.the track is available for download at Decipher's page,so check out that hot song!